How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

Last Updated: 02.07.2025 10:24

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.

By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

Everyone says the pet population is out of control. Everyone says you MUST spay or neuter your pets. No one wants to talk about how its almost $1,000 to spay or neuter a pet. Why is it so expensive if its so necessary? Animal shelters do it for free.

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.

By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

By taking turns talking.

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By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”